flying

So I realized, 10 minutes into my flight, while we were just getting ready to take off, that this was the first time I’d flown since last year. And suddenly, I was very, very nervous. And I’m by no means a nervous flyer, having made more than my fair share of trips in my short life. But there it was. I was scared. And I glanced around to see which psycho was about to kill me. But everyone just looked bored. And 10 minutes later, lost in a Harper’s article, I forgot all about it.

Tango, is not an airline for big & tall. My seat on the way out, I could not fit in. My knees, when contained within my space, were jammed, obviously noticeably, into the back of the poor man in front of me. When not, I took up the aisle. On the way back, my shoulders stuck out above the seat rest, which had those built-in pillow/wings combos, with the result that I sat arched, uncomfortably, the entire way, unable to slouch due to lack of room in front of me. I tried slouching with my legs in the aisles, which was more comfortable for me, but completely in the way of everyone else. Whilst dozing, I nearly tripped a woman carrying her child. But there is a lesson to be learned here, which is that, when flying economy on econo-airlines, I must remember to either get first row or exit row, as those are the only ones with slightly more legroom. On the return flight, i was comically taller than everyone else on the flight, which i had surmised while waiting to board, and confirmed when sitting down. While several other heads protruded fully above their seats, I was the only one whose shoulders did also. The flight attendent, a prissy jerk, also informed me in no uncertain terms that everyone could fit in their seat, so perhaps I could make more of an effort to tuck my legs in? A demonstration of such earned a ‘hrmm’, but no apparent sympathy or understanding of my plight.

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