I received the following resumé today. As a side note, it was addressed to email@example.com. which is now defunct, in favour of pencilneck.net.
From: (address removed)
Sent: Monday, June 30, 2003 12:39 PM
Subject: I belong at Pencilneck! VERY Impressive Junior Programmer Resume
(name and address removed)
Monday, June 30, 2003
Re: Junior Programmer position
I am very interested in any programming/database position with Pencilneck. I know from my research surrounding Pencilneck that I can offer you an IMMEDIATE contribution in Java, ASP, PHP, VB, ADO and SQL. However, as my resume will demonstrate, I have a variety of additional skills both technical and otherwise. I have a Sales and Management background, and I would be open to discussing any opportunities you may have. Simply put, I’m one of the most passionate and dedicated people you will EVER find, and I am 100% positive that I will be a valued member of your programming team.
I have been interested in Pencilneck for a while now, and I am confident that I can far exceed any expectations you have of a Junior programmer. However, I am also a true ‘people person’. I’m easy to get along with, and integrate immediately into the team around me. I am an incredibly fast learner with a lot of experience and ability, and I’m looking only for a small chance to prove that. I am confident that I can bring a great deal of enthusiasm and creativity to the table
I would like the chance to meet with you face to face so that we could discuss this further. Please call me anytime to arrange an interview. I need just one small chance to prove I am what you’re looking for!
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I know you probably get a lot of these emails.
I look forward to meeting with you.
Now why is this funny? Well, for one, clearly, dude didn’t do his research, or he’d know that Pencilneck Creations was a Cold Fusions house, not a php, asp, ado, vb or Java house. He’d also know that it was no longer in operation, in favour of Pencilneck Software. Pencilneck Creations has been redirecting to Pencilneck Software for some time now. The final odd thing is the re: Junior Programmer Position, as if he was responding to a specific ad, that was never placed. Anyhoo, I found it funny. Probably, like most resumés I get, it came via The Firm List. Anyone else on there get one?